Beneath The Surface of Doing and Thinking

Spirit asks me if I am conscious.

Of what?

Of anything.

I’m conscious of being asked if I’m conscious.

That’s not the same thing.

The same thing as what?

Of being conscious.

As in being aware?

Of what?

Then, to be conscious is to be aware?

Of what?

Of whatever.

Of whatever what?

Of whatever is happening that I’m conscious or aware of.

Yes.

What does that mean?

It means that you use two words to mean the same thing.

Why not?

When you use awareness or consciousness, why do you
give awareness a higher social status position
in your spiritual reading, writing, and thinking?

Perhaps they don’t mean exactly the same thing as
each other.

In what way?

You would know …

Yes, but do you?

I think so.

So?

Consciousness is possession of at least some capacity
to be aware of and understand what is happening
around me, while awareness is intentionally
conscious of what is happening, and attempting to
understand why my dear Spirit Teacher has chosen
to focus my attention on the difference or
differences between the meanings of consciousness
and awareness.

Do you think I have a purpose?

I know you have a purpose.

How do you know?

You always have a purpose.

Yes, but do you?

Is it possible to do or think about anything without
a purpose for doing so?

Why just do or think?

Without including emotions?

Yes.

I don’t know. Perhaps they’re somewhere beneath
the surface of everything we do or think.

Yes.

Simplicity is Where Thinking Begins

Spirit tells me that Simplicity has its place
but it should not be as a quality of thought.

Is that a personal comment?

Yes.

Why do you not scold my simplicity of emotion?

What have your emotions to do with your thinking?

Is it possible to have deep thoughts and simple
emotions?

What have emotions to do with thinking?

You’re luring me into an intellectual trap.

Yes.

Then, pleas explain.

What?

The relationship between thought and emotion

They interact with each other.

As cause and effect?

Which would be cause?

Emotion.

No.

If thought does not act on emotion, then …

But, thought does act on emotion.

Then why do you say emotion does not
cause thought.

Because it isn’t necessarily so.

Then, interact in this case means …

Mutual influence.

How do they influence each other?

Some of us develop the capacity
to think rationally, while still
maintaining uncomplicated emotions.

Then you approve of simple emotions?

There are no other kind.

There is only one story.

Spirit tells me that our capacity to understand what is happening round us greatly expands over a lifetime. But, our awareness does not develop without experience and with reflection on that experience, with intent to understand why it happened and what effect it had on our development.

When we recall childhood memories we need to be aware that they are memories of a child, the child we once were. A child recorded, perhaps traumatic experiences, as seen through the eyes of a child. Now, as an adult, we revisit the past and view the situations from the perspective of distance and, hopefully, developed maturity.

In the event of a similar situation experienced today, we might respond quite differently than we did long ago.

A child is usually helpless and frightened in situations beyond her or his control or understanding. The memory of terror, felt as a child, would be possibly missing in our review.

Our personal collection of memories is as a history book. There is usually no continuous, interconnected series of events recorded. And, what we do remember may or may not have contributed, more or less, to our present level of maturity and understanding of our life.

“Then what purpose is served by our memories?”

“They tell us a human story that helps us relate to other human stories, real or fiction.

“And we are more able to feel a connection with other stories because they confirm our own life story?”

“Yes. It’s the collection that is the real story. Our individual stories make sense only as part of a greater one.”

“I think you’re leading me to something.”

“Yes, the awareness that there is only one story.”

Studying with Spirit

There are times when studying with my Spirit Teacher is less than a

Pleasure. There seems to be such a deep and wide gulf between

The awesome wisdom He would share with me and my shallow

Capacity to absorb it that I must protest.

 

What do You expect from me? I’m not that bright. Perhaps you want

More than I could ever give.

 

We know more than you what you are potentially capable of being,

Doing, and giving, and We more than reasonably expect. We know

What we can and what we cannot expect from you or anyone else.

Understanding is Knowing

Spirit tells me that awareness is an ever-deepening experience of

Understanding, with the capacity to expand forever.

 

The more we understand how each life form has the potential

To affect every other, the more clearly we will know, for

Understanding is knowing, that all life is much more than

Interconnected; it is interwoven.

 

We each are part of everything else.

Spirituality’s Seductive Nature

It was not love at first sight, at least not in a physical sense, since I

Have not yet developed the capacity to visualize that area wherein

Form and essence merge in ever-finer elements of matter.

 

But, human and spirit qualities seem to be, in many ways,

More close than similar. And, so would be the potentially

Seductive nature of student and teacher attraction.

 

When I ask Spirit to explain why mutual attraction to

Spiritual values could …

 

Be corrupted? The corruption, or danger of such, is in

My own mind, or it isn’t.

 

He then reminds me of the countless gurus I have followed

Throughout many lifetimes, or so it seems, with each one

Falling from grace, in my mind.

 

They didn’t fall; they seemed to crash. Confucius might calmly

Comment, “No blame”, but I was, each and every time,

Devastated and confused. I was sure, beyond a doubt, again,

Again, and yet again that I had discovered a philosophy

To live by that explained everything, until it didn’t.

 

Will I meet the same fate?

 

How can I know..?

 

Until or unless it happens?

 

Yes, and perhaps that scares me.

 

Why? When it is time to move on to another teacher, we must,

Or stagnate.

 

My earlier teachers belonged to recorded history…

 

So, were less personally a part of your life?

 

Yes.

 

 

 

Oneness with viariable attributes

Spirit tells me that spirituality is a natural capacity

To expand a mystical awareness and understanding

Of life that develops compassion for others.

 

We can, if we will to, increasingly recognize

Ourselves in others, and others in ourselves,

Without which, He claims, compassion is not

Possible.

 

There is no essential difference between anyone.

We could never, He tells me, recognize love or

Hostility in others, if we were incapable of

Experiencing, to a greater or lesser degree,

Perhaps, the emotions that we witness.

 

In essence, there is oneness with variable attributes.

 

I’m playing a game I can’t win, and know it.

Spirit tells me that

I’m playing a game I can’t win.

Somehow, I suspect this may be true, but,

How am I supposed to respond

To Spirit’s sometimes power strategies.

 

Are they designed to weaken my resolve

To resist accepting as true,

anything that I can’t understand?

even knowing that my capacity

to understand is limited, or

Do I resist for the sake of resisting? or,

Have I developed a habit of resisting

The mind boggling concepts Spirit

Presents me with, to simply deny

The limitation of my mental capacity

To understand them?, and, if this is true,

Then why?

 

Wouldn’t it be so much easier

To simply give in, and say,

Okay, you win.

Am I just to stubborn to do so?

 

But, what if Spirit’s intention is

To encourage my capacity to resist being

A mindless sponge, or

A spineless sponge, if

There be such things.