“Chela”, Spirit seems to sigh with hopeless resignation at my distress. Where is the compassion and understanding? Surely I have suffered enough.
“Chela”, my mind must have wandered. Blame it on stress.
“You have always, it seems, excused, or tried to excuse, obnoxious and, or abusive behaviour on the pretention, and I repeat, pretention, that it was due to a lack of development of more socially acceptable forms of behaviour, and not to a deliberate intent to offend or harm you. And then, though the incident stresses you to tears, you blame yourself for being too sensitive. When will you dare to accept that what seems abusive, is abuse”.
“It is a Law of Nature”, Spirit reminds me, for haven’t I heard this lecture a thousand times or more, “that every action we consciously, or through habit, choose to undertake, requires intent. And, when you, through need of whatever, choose to excuse abusive behaviour, not only are you being less than honest with yourself, you are sharing in that behaviour, as a co-abuser. This is called self-abusive behaviour”.
How does that fit?” He then asks, almost smugly, Is He throwing me a challenge? Perhaps, but if so, I’m in no emotional condition to defend myself, at least, not yet.